(Here's a little comparison for you. 37 weeks 3 days with both pregnancies)
And oh am I ready. I'm so anxious to see her sweet little face and to kiss her smooth baby cheeks. I'm dying to get to know her. To hold her and relish those newborn snuggles. And truth be told, I'm ready to get my body back. While I can't complain because this pregnancy has been pretty darn easy, it will be nice to be able to bend over easily and get up without so much effort.
The nursery is complete. The diapers and wipes and all of the tiny little baby socks are organized and put away, just waiting to be used. All of the baby gear has been brought up from the garage. There's a swing in the living room and the Rock N Play in our room, right next to my side of the bed. We even have the carseat installed. I have to say it's pretty surreal to see TWO carseats in the backseat of my car.
So, technically I'm ready. But I have to be honest and tell you that I'm also not. As excited as I am to welcome this precious child into our lives, I'm also scared out of my mind. I've forgotten all about the sleepless nights and constant diaper changes. The nonstop nursing sessions and the neediness. Honestly, I've pretty much forgotten what it's like to have a newborn or even a baby for that matter. They say it all comes back to you but what if it doesn't. I know as a second time mom I shouldn't worry about these things because I've done it before. But that feels like a lifetime ago and I'm just not sure I'm ready for the task!
And if I'm being 100 percent honest, I'm not just nervous. I'm even a little sad. It's so bittersweet to see Emerson's time as an only child come to an end. For the last 2 and a half years she has been my little sidekick. My shopping buddy and lunch date. She's been my sole focus and my purpose each day. She stole my heart from the moment I laid eyes on her and I swear I love her more and more each day. She's my best little buddy and I truly enjoy spending time with her. So thinking about how much that's about to change has brought me to tears more than once. As I put her to bed each night I wonder if it's her last night as an only child. I question whether I've truly taken in each moment of the day and soaked up every precious second. And before I go to bed each night I pray that she knows just how much I love her and how much she truly means to me. My precious girl that made me a momma.
I know we will eventually get back into a routine and we will still be able to get out and do things but I also know it's going to be different and there's nothing that can be done about that. It's just hard letting go of what our lives have been for the last 2.5 years and getting ready to fully embrace what they are to become.
At the same time, I know that Emerson is going to be the most amazing big sister. I read an article about siblings not long ago and it said that a sibling is the most amazing lifelong gift that you could ever give your child. That really rang true for me and it's been one of the things that's really helped when I feel anxious about bringing Adelyn home. I pray that Emerson and Adelyn will not only be sisters, but also very best friends for life.
Most of all I pray for strength, wisdom, and God's guidance as we grow from three to a family of four. I know that I am beyond blessed to be a mother to two precious little girls and I just want to be the best I can be for them. I am certain that it is one of the most important roles that I will ever fill and I just want to do it right.
Ready or not, our lives are about to be doubly blessed! I know that no amount of preparation will really make us ready for this huge life change but I am also quite sure that once Adelyn is here we won't be able to remember what life was like without her. With that I feel pretty confident saying, "Come on sweet girl, your family is anxiously waiting to meet you!"